Monday, January 21, 2008

Do You Know Who This Is?

This girl needs my help.


Not only is she beautiful, but she's rich. (How rich? More than you can imagine. I can imagine a lot.) Or should that be the other way around?

You see, she has fifteen million dollars in a bank account and needs someone that she can trust, namely me, to invest it for her here in America. Smart too. She wants to diversify across market sectors.

The money was willed to her by a rich uncle (who was recently poisoned--long story). Now she has to move the money out of her account, and soon, before her brothers get their hands on it and leave her penniless.

I have to help, if not for her, then to strike a blow against the injustices of patriarchical society!

Oh, and she can't wait to meet me. She's single too. In life, it's really about timing. What are the chances?

The Boston FBI informs me (with a chuckle) that they already have reams of info on this one. But thanks for calling.


Kaycie said...

Look at those legs. I think she has an unfair advantage over men.


Jada's Gigi said...

I'll be the ONLY people she emails are men! :)

mr. schprock said...

Hey! That's MY girl!

Toni Anderson said...

LOL. Way back in 1997 I got an actual letter from a guy in a similar situation. Poor guy had all this money but no way of getting a bank account. The injustice.

At least email means they don't have to pay for paper and stamps.


PS. I've been watching the football. Very sad for the Cowboys, but DH was upset when the Packers lost. Now we have to chose. My son always picks both. I kind of like that :)

Scott said...

Kaycie - Yes, I think you are right.

Cheryl - I think it's a template so that the names and the pictures are interchangable...

Mr. Schprock - After loving me she told me she could never love another... (hint, Jackson and McCartney)

Toni - That's a very nice way to watch sports. I think your son might be on to something. Very cute, Toni. As for football, I shouldn't choose. So far it hasn't been a good sign.

magnetbabe said...

And she dresses like a piece of Fruit Stripe gum.

Shesawriter said...

ROFLMAO!! Good one, Scott. :-)

Alan said...

LOL, Mr. Schprock! Magnetbabe dissed your girl! Blogfight!

Jaye Wells said...

Chain link fences are such charming backdrops, no? Or maybe you didn't notice the fence. Probably not.

Ultra Toast Mosha God said...

I have a russian girl lurking in my inbox with a similar dilemma.

She wants to meet for 'Friendship then marriage'

Not even a comma for pause..

The Zombieslayer said...

You got a picture with yours? How come you got a picture and I didn't?

Scott said...

I forgot to mention that I wrote back: "I appreciate the opportunity. What do I need to do?" That's when I got the picture and the phone number of her lawyer.

Kathleen said...

You're such a kind, caring man to offer to help. ;-) I just delete all those e-mails. Most I don't even open.

That dress screams bad 80s to me.

Please root for the Pats...if you're the reason the Packers lost. ;-)

Alan said...

Oh no you didn't Kathleen, LOL. You want SCOTT to root for the PATRIOTS?

*ducks and runs for cover*