Wednesday, September 06, 2006

First of First

It's Jackson's first day of first grade, and his first ride to school on the bus. The video camera is cued and ready to record. I taped the packing of the first lunch into the Scooby Doo lunch box, and interviewed the new student while he ate a bowl of sugar packed cereal. I'm working at home today so I can be here to walk him to the bus stop. Although he wants to ride the bus now, we've assured him that he doesn't have to. Some people would call that shielding. So be it.

When school is over, it's really over. It only lives inside our brains and in the movies. But it has as much to do with reality as snipe hunting.

Emmett is virtually diaper free now that he does both orders of business sitting on the mini-throne. It's amazing how much build up there is in such a little guy. Just yesterday I got a call from my wife.

"Honey! Oh my God!"

I braced myself for the worst. "What is it?"

"Roxy* just ate some of Emmett's poo."

I'm normally reserved for personal phone conversations at work, but I started laughing, and didn't stop for a very long time after I hung up.

"What should I do? Will she be alright?"

I couldn't stop laughing to answer. When I lived on a ranch, there were two dogs that roamed the property. The horse corral was littered with horse manure, but some were fresh, green and steamy. The dogs loved those in particular, and would face off, all growls and teeth like two boxers before a match while the ref is saying, "Keep it clean boys."

Finally I managed, "I think everything will be fine."

* Our new puppy


Bernita said...

I always do a double-take at "snipe-hunting."
It's amazing how many people think snipe are entirely imaginary.

Kathleen said...

Ick. Good for Emmett, but ick on Roxy! Oh yeah, still waiting for pics of Roxy, aren't I? ;-)

Scott said...

Bernita - Count me among them! I actually read my own wikipedia link after you posted this. Still, at every campout, there is always one sucker going on a snipe hunt. I guarantee that all the pranskters have no idea snipes really exist either.

Kat - Yeah yeah yeah. I'm working on it.

Ultra Toast Mosha God said...

Ha ha!!!




How is it that dogs can get away with this kind of behaviour and still be branded 'cute' yet if humans do it, they are deemed to be disgusting?

fringes said...

Great post. I didn't think about the first day pre-interview. Dang.

Yay for both boys.

magnetbabe said...

How is the wife holding up watching her little men grow up so quickly? It's got to be an emotional roller coaster.

And the last part? I hope you're proud of yourself, grossing out all your readers. Blech!

Scott said...

Toast - I thought you would like this one!

Fringes - It sounds like you've got a lot going on.

Nat - I was juggling a few different topics today: nuclear fusion, my proposed counter point to Einsteins theory of relativity, and why his hypothesis that the speed of light is impossible to exceed is full of shit. Then the whole shit thing got me thinking more literally, then, well, you can see where it went. Apples and oranges Nat.

mr. schprock said...

Note to self: read Scott's blog before or after lunch, not during it.

Congratulations on your son's milestone. I wouldn't mind going for a bus trip clutching my Scooby Doo lunch box. Beats what I'm doing right now.

Beth said...

Oh my gosh, that whole breakfast/lunch box/school bus thing was darling. Makes me remember those days.

Shielded? Nah. My kids are 12 and 13 ... I don't let them ride the bus. I take them every day.

And yuckers on the poop, but I was more amazed at your wife calling you "honey". I've never called my husband anything except John, Dad, and Daddy.

Jada's Gigi said...

Snipe hunting!! lol
Good for you with the video camera and all. Way to prepare, Dad!
AS for the poo incident...what is it with dogs and random poop...I have actually seen my dog roll in the stuff. You can bet he didn't come in the house unless he went straight ot the tub afterward either!! Gross!

Jaye Wells said...

At least Emmett didn't eat it...

Moni said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Moni said...

Ah ha! That is too funny! My dog eats cat poop quite frequently. That is why I never ever let her lick me in the face.

I don't want to be shit-faced! lol

Okay I'll stop now.

Scott said...

Mr. Schprock - Sorry man!

Beth - We never call each other by name. If she calls me Scott, I know I'm in big trouble.

Jaye - Now that's the power of positive thinking!

Moni - *Groan* =8>)