Thursday, September 07, 2006

New Directions

I no longer thing Dilana will win on Rock Star. She's the best, but two things hinder her ascension. First: rock and roll is about the chicks. A female lead means co-ed backstage parties. Without a virulent male lead, the geriatrics playing the instruments must rely on their own prowess, which is declining fast. With a male lead, they can at least shave off the straggling hopefuls. This is why JD is currently the lead singer of INXS, or INX-who?

JD also excelled at point two: creating original music. Dilana is just ok at this, but Supernova really needs the help. Three or four of their originals have been performed so far, and each gave me a great big yawn.

My advice to Dilana, tell them all to screw. You're better than all of them put together. My wife may have a point. She says that the band is afraid of being upstaged. That could certainly be true. Find yourself some talented songwriters and rise to prominence on your own. Creatively the bad sucks, proving once again that the product is not necessarily equal to the sum of its parts.

Tonight is my first day of Writing Popular Fiction at UMass Lowell. I pray the machine lathers, rinses then repeats, and spits out a novelist ready to lay his problems out on a rolling space scroll. I'm ready dammit!

I may have a new mission in life, a direction if you will. Perhaps, and I haven't decided for sure, but perhaps my magnum opus will be an expose on the dark underbelly of suburban America. The movie tagline will be: In suburbia, everyone can hear you scream--they just don't care.


Bernita said...

That's a good tag line.

Helga von porno said...

They do care. I was screaming the other day in response to the meaningless of it all. NO, I was screaming with ennui. No, I was screaming with Shiva, and the negative vibe of the universe. I am not actually sure why I was screaming. But they did care. They banged on the ceiling. Then they came to the door. I answered, continueing to scream, since I hadn't yet understood why. They pour a bucket of water over me! I stopped screaming. What was that all about? They clearly cared, anyway, that's my point.

Scott said...

Bernita - I kinda liked it too.

Helga - I was a fool and stand corrected. Good one!

Jaye Wells said...

Scott, sounds like your neighbors provide plenty of material. Here's another tag line:
In suburbia, variety is not tolerated.

Jada's Gigi said...

laughing out loud at work over here!...the dark underbelly of surburban America?!?!

magnetbabe said...

Re: Rock Star. Never seen it, but even if your favorite gets kicked off, remember there is no such thing as bad publicity. If you know who she is, she'll get a contract somewhere.

Re: Underbelly of suburban America. I think there should be a part where the screaming is treated against the protagonist's will by having Botox forcefully injected into their face.

Re: Your comment to me yesterday. I'm am curious to hear your theories- or are you just as full of sh*t as Emmett's potty and Roxy's belly?

Scott said...

Jaye - Or: Suburbia--alone in a crowd.

Cheryl - Glad to be of service

Nat - True on the publicity angle. One of the ex-rockers already is selling records. As for the botox treatments, I would add that once treated, they look and act just like John Kerry. As for my theories, I think you are getting the generally correct impression.

fringes said...

I have no idea what you guys are talking about. Must be a country club thing.

Jaye Wells said...

Suburbia--leave your personality at the door.

Scott said...

Fringes - You must live in a nice part of Houston.

Jaye - Suburbia - You will be assimilated.

fringes said...

I can only guess that I live in a more varied part of suburbia. But I don't interact with my neighbors much except to ask about their day when I'm outside with the kids. They could be cyborgs for all I know. They seem friendly.

Bailey Stewart said...

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into suburbia.

3 more days!

Sadie Lou said...

re: Supernova--
I haven't watched all the shows but of the couple I have seen, Dahlia rocked it. She has what it takes to front a band and she's super sexy--something Supernova could need a good dose of. My parents are really into this show because they stopped watching American Idol two seasons ago and they've been looking to fill the void ever since.

Shesawriter said...

Good luck Popular Fiction Writer. :-)


Ultra Toast Mosha God said...

Let's look at Supernova's supergroup competition in the marketplace:

Audioslave - The charred remains of Rage Against The Machine and Soundgarden that rose from the dead like the proverbial phoenix to release a critically acclaimed debut that sold bucketloads, as did their superior second album. They release their third album in the U.K today. Will undoubtedly sell a boatload.

Velvet Revolver: Formed as above, but insert Guns and Roses and the Stone Temple Pilots instead. 1st album sold in droves. Second album still due.

INXS and Supernova will never be able to compete with these bands, simply because the market they have committed to is the reality TV crowd - a crowd who are far more interested in the birthing of an artist than their ongoing upbringing.

This makes INXS and Supernova the puppies that get bought for Christmas and end up in rescue centres, whereas Audioslave and Velvet Revolver are the pedigree's bought by the serious breeder.